FB

Sometimes when you are looking around FB.. pictures randomly pop up. For the first time in a long time pictures of Shane popped up tonight.. Now, I can't sleep. His pictures seem so... like he is right there... so near! The terrible realization that he will not be there in a few weeks.. sucks! It makes no sense.. I have been home without him being there. BUT this was the moment we were waiting for... to come back home! It is terrible. Why does death have to be part of our life... I wish we could all continue to live happily ever after! :) I know- keep dreaming. Sometimes when FB puts those pictures.. it sucks.

So not only can I not sleep- I am emotional. So many things going through my head. In a span of about a year I lost my brother and best friend. It is hard not to question why? But... why!? What is the purpose behind all of this? I did not lose my BF to death in case you are confused! :) God is good.. That is what I keep telling myself. I told myself that over and over after Shane's death.. I wondered if I would ever believe it again. I do. Do I understand anything? NO! But I do know that My God is good!