Sometimes I wonder if I am crazy to be staying home. I spent four and a half years getting my undergrad to teach and spent another year getting my Masters. Let us not speak of the amount of money that I (ERRR) still owe for my education... to teach other children. I had some of the best five years of teaching and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I made a difference. I loved those kids. I learned so much with the teachers that I taught with. There were moments this year, especially in August and September, that I would pass a school or read things on FB from my teacher friends... and my heart would twinge... because it is still so hard to believe I am not teaching. But you know what I recently realized- my heart not longer aches for the classroom... I am building my own classroom, with my own child, in our own home! I love it. What more could one ask for than to be able to watch the child that the Lord has placed in their life... grow and learn.. daily!!! I am blessed.
Noah is so smart and amazes me. The other day he gave me directions to put the lid on a container, close the lid, put the container in the cabinet, and shut the door. All I could do was say "Yes, Sir" ... he is just so bright. I am so thankful that my husband is allowing me to be the 'teacher' our son needs. I have become someone I never thought I would be.
My heart is to homeschool. Shocking? Yes! But I desire to teach him any our future children. Why would I want to put them in school with other teachers so that I can go teach other peoples children? For ME, it doesn't make sense.. This is my desire. BUT I am not positive that this is what the Lord wants for our life... we shall see. We have plenty of time, I just wait.. and pray.
I have said many a time, to many a people that I wish Nate would just LET ME be a STAY AT HOME MOM. Not work at home. But you know what I realized last week when I had no kids? I don't want to be a SAHM. For Cassey- it would be dangerous. I can see myself becoming lazy, enthralled in Lifetime, forgetting who I am. Then i look at the boys the Lord has placed in my care thus far.. and I watch as they grow... and once again, I know that I am right where I need to be.
Plain and simple- the bigger picture... I was made to be a wife and mom... and I am so very thankful for that. I truly believe I was made to make our home, home... to take care of my husband as he should be taken care of, and to mother my child- from my home! God calls differnet people for different things and for this time being- I know I am right where I belong.
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