9

That is how many days that I had until I saw my brother... I get angry when I think about that. We had a plan.. a great plan to meet at the Longview Airport that Sunday night.. he was going to have all of his kids. He was so excited-- just as excited as I was. When we were talking about it... he went on to tell me about how hard it was when I got on that plane a year and a half ago in the same airport... and how he cried and cried. It shocked me that he was telling me that- and shocked me even more that he cried. I was so uncontrollable that day... crying constantly. Had I known it was going to be my last time to see him or touch him, I would have held onto him a lot longer. I would have talked to him more... I would have climbed up into that ball pit at Kids Station with him.. I would not have left his side!! Had I known that day in June 2008 was going to be the last time for me to see him... I would have left him more voicemails when I called instead of telling him it was a waste of my time because he didn't check them! :) I miss him. A ton.

It just hit me.. I did see my brother again... on the EXACT day I was suppose too.. but .. instead of being able to hug my big, strong, brother... I had to look at him in that coffin. Really? Really?? Life really isn't fair.

But then I think of all these people in Haiti.. and I feel so selfish. It could have been so much worse, and I know that! I just pray that God can give us strength... give my mom strength.. and Britt... it is so hard, life is hard. ......